Few Words and Faithfulness

Aves just asked me where the bucket of water is to pour in the potty. We have been living with no running water as of lately which explains the question. Culture shock will take many forms in the days ahead and probably in the moments that we least expect them. Like when the kind man at immigrations asked us the routine questions about what we were doing out of the country. We answered his questions and he said, "thank you for your service and welcome home to you." The tears were stuck in my throat and wanted to spill over. We're fragile. Home is a strange, mysterious and abstract concept at the moment. And this is just the beginning.

We took off this morning, seeing the shacks below and the palm trees lining the beaches. As foreign as it has felt to us from home, it feels stranger leaving it behind. We met dark skinned friends at the airport this morning who hugged a little longer and listened to the girls' excitement and sadness swirled around. We left part of our hearts with them.

The last week has been another round of lasts. But in a sense we are leaving family for family. Not everyone has multiple families existing across the waters but we do. Last night we sat at dinner with Coach and Jasmine speaking words of gratitude and giggling over the highs of the day. There was a certain silence we haven't experienced before that goes with the unavoidable separation. Spoons clanging the plates of bouillon and no words to say about the hours ahead. But then in Ava fashion, we move past the silence to laughter and everyone is relieved the moment of sadness is passed. I thank God quietly that he gives us the laughter, and that sadness only comes in waves and not all at once. We sing a few songs at the table and then move to the bedroom. Chi Chi is asleep as soon as Coach plays her requested Jesus Loves Me. Then we go on to sing all of our favorites. Achim joins in and he's playing alongside Coach. I love that when there are no words, there are songs with common words that can come out in tune. Farmer records them so we can hear them again. The night was a representative of a lot of depth in relationship and a lot of laughter that brought us together in the first place. In fact, the week was just that; the gift of time. Runs in the neighborhood with Achim, Prestige and football on TV, la lo with crabmeat, traffic jams, guitar and singing, and a lot of the mundane life  - together. Farmer said, "I know more about Haitian culture from the last two weeks than I did from the last 18 months." We have bucketed water from the street to the house and washed clothes by hand. We have all cheered together when a light comes on and we celebrate a little bit of electricity. Yesterday afternoon we celebrated electricity by putting together bananas, peanut butter, nutella and milk for a smoothie. It's life's little moments. I took one more tumble on a run for good measure this week. Seems like I fall before every trip back so I look banged up consistently but it's minimal and I'm sure I'm stronger for it. Running every day on rocks guarantees a fall or two. But it's about getting back up and continuing. Back on the horse.

On Sunday we were at Port Au Prince Fellowship for the first time in months and we heard a sermon about Psalm 145. It was a rare occasion that I read that text before church and then it was the primary focus of the sermon. The speaker made three things clear about a "missing verse" in the chapter. Verse 14 is about God's FAITHFULNESS, KINDNESS and the FULLNESS of his promises. I have really focused on God's faithfulness. He has done it before. He'll do it again. He is kind in his every day dependability. Faithfulness itself is kind. It is loving. I think by following through with the every day cleaning up messes or showing up on time or providing dinner, I am being faithful in the mundane and that is loving and kind. The absence of it is unpredictability and hurt. Missed expectations. Thanking God for faithfulness and kindness today. Standing on the promises. Believing in the fullness of them that he was, he is and he always will be.

May God turn our lack of words to a song of praise today. Please pray us "home." Thank you for loving us well. Our hearts need the support today and the days to come.